Another valentine day is here

Proverbs 17:8 A gift is as a precious stone in the eyes of him that hath it: whithersoever it turneth, it prospereth.

Exodus 23:8 And thou shalt take no gift: for the gift blindeth the wise, and perverteth the words of the righteous.

The first time I got to hear the word was when I was about 10 years old. My dad used call my step mum Val. Then one day I felt I should make the correction, and I asked him why he calls her val? because her name was victoria and it should be Vicky, not val. He chuckled and told me a little about valentine day: always in February and it is called lover’s day and celebrated most part of the world,

February 14th, when lovers crack their brains on how to express their love in greetings and gifts. Bet you have been there when you are at a loss, which cards best express your heartfelt feelings, which perfume will speak for you when she sprays it. Most times it is the men who do the giving those days, don’t know if there is any change now. But valentine can be a double-edge sword. It has revealed true love to some while it has broken some to pieces. Here is a short story concerning a wonderful sister with godly qualities that would have made the entire world to celebrate her.

When it happened many discerning voices were not really surprise as they saw it coming, but it was too late for her: her faces was covered in bruises and deep cuts, her swollen face made her looked terrible, like a perfect make up for a scary movie. Here we are again, the month of February, a month many would fall a victim to many a womanizer, and other vices: A decent girl she was, well brought up by serious Christian parents, middle class. She was the epitome of beauty and good morals. So how come she found herself in a relationship that ended her life? How could a girl brought up in a strict religious environment end up in a terrible relationship she could not extricate herself? What is the secret of success of a notorious womanizer? how come they have the best woman in the society? How come their latest catch refuses to call it quits even after knowing they are other women in his life? What on earth could change this epitome of beauty, brain, and morals into a helpless creature , crying for attention?  Why and how was she able to turn from her circle of friends to another world where money and gifts do all the talking and you have want you want? VALENTINE does not hold such a good memory for our sister before her tragic end because she was a victim of the ills of valentine. Yes, valentine has its own bad side. It is time for the good, bad and the ugly go for hunting, a time it is easy to accept gifts from anybody because it a time to share. Many remember how wonderful a gift they receive from men, but too many too. It is the beginning of sorry. When gifts are doled out with ulterior motive, it is bad enough , but when nightmares follow it leaves many as victims. Our sister encountered this wonderful brother on valentine’s day, two years ago and it opened all kinds of gifts for her. So many gifts that she could not stop it even after the month of February. Her reasonings, her intelligence, her caution all became numb as she could not discern the motive and intention of this brother. When concerned friends and relations heard and found out some stuff about this brother ,it was too late for her to back out: she had already swallowed his bait hook, line and sinker. All around her reminds her of him: new television, new smartphone, new handbag, replenished wardrobe and there is even talk of getting her a car if she passes her driving exams. By the way, he has enrolled for her. When told that there are three other women in his life and this is the game he plays all the time, it was too late for her just like it was too late for the others. she made excuses for him, sympathised with him, promise to convince her mum and her pastor, the two closest people in her life, of his good intention: the bible says we should not judge, she added. What follows the next 6 months was all attempts that fell on deaf ears and she even kept away from her church. the last time pastor heard about her was her death because of domestic violence.

A good womanizer knows how to give good gifts to their victims, not their lovers. They can even have the impudence to borrow from the woman at home only to spend it on another woman, all these goes on: plying her with gifts, pressuring her with gifts, bombarding her with gifts! it just goes on with the intention not to allow her to think or apply the breaks. Her values are buried deep down in her head and she just allows the beautiful gifts to rob her of her sense of caution and forget about her moral upbringing. A pity when a church girl becomes very wayward and promiscuous. One question on my mind is valentine, a time to be morally loose and open to all sexual advances in the name of gifts? Must all who come with different gifts be accepted just because it is time to celebrate valentine? The answer is NO, for a gift takes away good motives and robs us of our ability to access a situation and comes to good judgment. The most potent tool in the hands of a womanizer is GIFTS. yet, the bible says that a man can give good gifts yet it does really loves you. 1 Corinthians 13:3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.  Giving to get something back is no giving at all. ‘ it is a killer motive. Those who fall for it will end up in deep regret and in the worst scenario, like our sister. The bible is the old good book. Always read and meditate on it, read and assimilate. It will guide you even if you  are orphaned, will lead you into higher places and fill you with wisdom.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Be guided, happy Valentine.

Published by godwinguobadia

Pastor, life coach, motivational speaker and a christian apologist; a husband and a father.

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